Monday, December 31, 2012

Ibi in 2013

hey peeps

so we all make new year resolutions?

i never do

but Jan 2012 i set one goal for Ibi

just one

really proud of me....

i sucessfully achieved it

2012 was a good year

i have decided to set just one goal for 2013

i'll let you all know in a year if i sucessfully achieve it

as for my mum---she needs a son in law...good thing is, she has learnt he will come...patience..His time is never late

my friends---they need for Ibi to own a money never complete,na by force? old truck showed me...and i refuse to buy a car i can only drive with the aid of a throw pillow

my father---he probably needs to get his wife pregnant...oh by the way,i oddly have no hard feelings towards the newly weds...i just dont feel the need to be friendly with his model(na so he talk am-i married a model)...she's 5 yrs older than Ibi-definitely too young to be my stepmum,she's my father's wife-plain and simple...anyone that knows her should advice her..the only children of my father who wish to enjoy her motherhood are the ones she'll bear him...QED

i dont pay for sex

fab news dat you wont pay for it

personally i dont think there should be an exchange of money for sex

you are horny,he is horny...fuck him,let him fuck you and dat is dat

my cousin's with regards married boos

you are married...your pussy dey house

what is wrong with it?

is it loose,cold,worn out,is the baby's head blocking the vaginal canal?

please explain to me why you wont pay me to fuck me na?

as you come my house come carry me say make we go catch up over drinks
come carry me go suites say make you massage me....

help me ask him

did i complain of weary muscles?
did he become a masseur in the couple of months we lost touch?

Ubongda and i were gisting and he has requested i tell her that asking for money wont put every guy off

she loled and said so far it has been foolproof

Ibi's take?

there is always an underlying reason to why men cheat

his wife has changed or he married the wrong woman.....akuko
she doesnt watch porn with him no more
she doesnt give head no more
she is away a lot
she is tired a lot
she wont try new things with him
she spends way too much money
she isnt bringing up the kids the way he wants
she doesnt have a good handle on her staff-domestic or otherwise
she exasperates him
she dis
she dat

he always goes back home to her

if he is not afraid of his wife...good for you

wife number 2 title awaits you or at least you are a kept woman: a mistress

if he is scared of his are OYO

Rita Dominic-i loved you in The meeting

i hated the concept of you in streets of calabar

Phoneswap.....i loved every minute of it

Dr Bello?....isaiah-why did you come to naija for such a silly script?

A wish....some good laffs....and sometimes i just wanted to bitchslap Umoh and Kemi's father

I lift my glass to you a year filled with the Good Lord's unending blessings and mercy...

Friday, October 12, 2012


So i've been away how many months?
i've lost count meself

Ibiluv turned 5 on the 31st of May
and for some reason i was too lazy to come here to celebrate

then i turned 34 on the 7th of October
and was too lazy to come here as well.......

i forgot about sex for the month of ramadhan

i've since remembered sex, but i dont have gist about any sexcapades......

Ibi!!!!!!!!!!! where is your mojo??????

My closest pal felt the need to let her hair down a couple of weeks ago and we
hooked up with some pals whilst dancing

after everyone was kinda spent on the dance floor

we went off to a strip joint

we had her younger bro and his babe in our entourage

the girl froze in her tracks and must have begged every angel in heaven to get her outta there

she gave pal and i, an attitude the next day

and her boyf came to say she was mighty angry she had to experience that and she assumed our male friends who took us along had dishonourable intentions

i laughed so hard cos i couldnt understand how going to a strip joint with pals had anything to do with honourable or dishonourable intentions

i dont need a man to lead me on a merry go round if he wants sum

same as i wont go on a merry go round with anyone if i want sum

reminds me how it was drummed into my ears growing up that you can never pick up a boyf or future hubby at a club

i'm not so sure i agree with that analogy

i hardly do any picking up at the club anyways

its just crazy that if i dump a guy in the friend zone.......there shall he stay

but if a guy find himself in the too hawt to resist zone....its hard to get him outta there

so for every ex whom i never succumbed to.........

its either of two things

you hurt me real bad


sex with you?????

...i dont feel the need to relive

cant relive it cos you are off limits

or cant relive it cos current beau does a better job than you ever did....wink

so is it wrong to hang out with a married pal?
say a group of friends share a meal and sweat (dancing)

seeing that he's leaving the club and heading home to his wife
i have no qualms about sharing sweat with a married pal
but if you think i was dancing too close????

no be me bring ur man come club o

and if you are married to him and you dont have kids below 10
but you let him go clubbing comment

we will dance close to him o
and we will grind against him with our assets sef

dont worry..........

we are only getting him hot and bothered enuff to come home to give you a little sumthing sumthing.........

mwah y'all

Ibi is back!!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, May 27, 2012

reality shows.....grandmas....3 wishes

Anyone who comes here

knows i love my reality tv shows

Sad Joshua didn't win idol but i loved the finale
2 hours of fabulous singing

i'm looking forward to a Joshua/Fantasia duet
a Josh album
a Skylar album
a Jessica album

please don't disappoint me people......

Ice and Coco?
love them

Khloe and Lamar?
love them

wont be caught dead watching it


i miss Ola and Chris

Now that maneta and zainab are in upville
i no longer watch downville



stop disgracing me

woman talk to you
instead make you reply
you go cry

man talk to you
instead make you reply
you go cry

parry dey house

instead make you dance

you go gum body for prezzo side

you dey gum body for him side
when he touch you
you go dey do like virgin


PLEASE come back home to make music

i met you briefly at champagne conversations and i was glad i did

as of now
you dey fall my hand

please nominate yourself and come home


because the girl in your videos and the wimp in bba are 2 different people

my colleague says you went into the house to find a husband

since you have found him

please come home


a pal of mine recently got married
she insists she needs help
she wants her mum around

in my place...........its the mother in law that gets to stay

hubby has told his mum to stay away-he thinks both mums don't need to stay

she on the other hand has re-invited her mother to stay

i say she is being stupid

cos if you ask me...its not like she needs help

she is just being lazy and doesn't yet understand that she is married

she wants her mum around her

i love my mum but i wont want her hovering around when i have a baby-my mama is too busy/funky to hover sef

she can go live with my brother(s)

and if my mother in law turns out to be like my friend's
i would love her for dat

pop in for a day or 2 to help
disappear for 4 days to a week.........rather than have her over 24/7 for my 3 months maternity leave

i said my piece when everyone did
which led to both mothers leaving

now dat she has re-invited her mother

i wont say a word

abegggiiiiiiiiiiiiii-before dey will ask me-wetin my own?
as i never marry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i need a genie-3 wishes

i need a wardrobe change

i need a holiday

i need for my new boss to be offered a job at Chevron

Thursday, April 12, 2012


after being confronted a couple of times by Dee and denying it...
i made an effort to listen to myself and i was shocked.....kinda
to find out my soundtrack is.......a tad religious
i've always thought and insisted...i am a moaner
but to find out i call on HIM....

erm erm Deee...u bad boyyyyyyyy...see what you make me doooooooo

ohhh and soundtracking in a local dialect during sex always sounds ludicrous
i've heard it...and i found it hilarious and no it wasnt Dee

i can be a tease and i do enjoy attention
but i wish small men could read my mind and leave me the fuck alone
i do not wish to measure height with(fuck) my twin(i dont have one)
if you are only about 2 cms taller than Ibi

been mad busy at work lately
oddly enuff i'm happiest if i've got a shitload of work to do
it makes playing much more fun when i get off work

do y'all remember my boss?
the one i wanted to kill?
naija jazz finally got to him
we are no longer alllowed into his office in his absence
and he carries *holy* water around now
which he periodically sprinkles on everyting in his office
apparently hez leaving us in a couple of months
some cocksuckers feigned sadness
i kept a straight face
well.......cos smiling or laffing out loud woud have been u know.....bad

1 more person Lord........that jazz needs to get to
ironically its not cruella
which ever doc is treating her at yaba left now
is doing a good job
shez sane 4 and a half days a week

crazy when Dee is miles away and i'm horny as a bitch
darn it..........I AM A BITCH ON HEAT
loads of cyber sex,online porn and dirty pictures
and darling mr b to the rescue
mr b? my vibrator.....wink

so its 520am now and btw 10pm when i got home and now
i've listened to a couple of movies(i wasnt paying attention)
whilst bantering with Dee and letting the porn vids download
i've also added a new stash to my collection of naughty pictures
and cummmmm a couple of times..........i wasnt counting
i have dinner half eaten-yes dinner dat late cos i skipped lunch
but its time to get up and get ready for work
erm i forgot to sleep....... appetite has been messed up lately-not sure y
i'm gonna get me some vits-i've lost a kilo or 2
loosing kilos isnt acceptable oooooo

Ubong sebi u know i'm talking about ya friend
hmmmmmmmm i have gist for you
lets discuss this away from blogspot

ciao people!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, February 19, 2012


met a good looking guy a while back at work

we flirted on the fone a couple of times

i may have fantasised about straddling him-wink

but guy has gone underground............i'm 6 years older

i miss the flirting though

i'm sooooooooooooooo loving Adele right now

Sad about Whitney
tired of all the hate directed at Bobby
we all make our own way in life
i pray she found peace with God before going under