> A Sunday School teacher asked her class why Joseph
> and Mary took Jesus
> with them to Jerusalem.
> A small child replied: "They couldn't get a baby
> The Ten Commandments
> A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten
> Commandments with her five
> and six year olds. After explaining the commandment
> to "honor thy father
> and thy mother," she asked,"Is there a commandment
> that teaches us how to
> treat our brothers and sisters?"
> Without missing a beat one little boy answered,
> "Thou shall not kill."
> An elderly woman died last month. Having never
> married, she requested no
> male pallbearers. In her handwritten instructions
> for her memorial
> service, she wrote, "They wouldn't take me out while
> I was alive, I don't
> want them to take me out when I'm dead."
> Church Announcement
> There is the story of a preacher who got up one
> Sunday and announced to
> his congregation: "I have good news and bad news.
> The good news is, we
> have enough money to pay for our new building
> program. The bad news is,
> it's still out there in your pockets."
> A little girl became restless as the preacher's
> sermon dragged on and on.
> Finally, she leaned over to her mother and
> whispered, "Mommy, if we give
> him the money now, will he let us go?"
> The Boasting Boys
> Three boys are in the schoolyard bragging about
> their fathers. The first
> boy says, "My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece
> of paper, he calls it a
> poem, they give him $50."
> The second boy says, "That's nothing. My Dad
> scribbles a few words on a
> piece of paper, he calls it a song, they give him
> The third boy says, "I got you both beat. My Dad
> scribbles a few words on
> a piece of paper, he calls it a sermon. And it takes
> eight people to
> collect all the money!"