FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i've got nurring much to say

my itch is still dia

my crystal ball still hasnt come up with a face

it looks like i aiint getting any

i will survive this drought

going celibate is not an option

ignoring the itch hardly helps

lately i've been admiring this good looking brother
that works in a differnt branch of my firm-its not
like i need him to scratch my itch....

i just like watching him walk.....*sigh*..the swagger


well Enigma....this is for you.....




A chicken and egg are lying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette
with a satisfied smile on its face, while the egg is frowning and
looking slightly annoyed. The chicken turns over on its side and mutters,
"Well, I guess that solves that debate."




Jack decides to go skiing with his buddy Bob. They load up Jack's
station wagon and head north. After driving for a few hours, they get
caught in a terrible blizzard. They pull into a nearby farmhouse and
ask the attractive lady of the house if they can spend the night.

"I'm recently widowed," she explains, "and I'm afraid the neighbors
will talk if I let you stay in my house."

"Not to worry," Jack says, "we'll be happy to sleep in the barn."

Nine months later, Jack gets a letter from the widow's attorney. He
calls up his friend Bob and says, "Bob, do you remember that
good-looking widow at the farm we stayed at?"

"Yes, I do," Bob says.

"Did you happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the
house and have sex with her?" Jack asks.

"Yes, I have to admit that I did," Bob says.

"Did you happen to use my name instead of telling her your name?" Jack
asks.

Bob's face turns red and he says, "Yeah, I'm afraid I did."

"Well, thanks a lot, pal…” Jack says. “She just died and left me her
farm."



A couple was on their honeymoon, lying in bed, ready to consummate
their marriage, when the new bride says to the husband, “I have a confession
to make, I’m not a virgin.”

The husband replies, “That’s not a big deal in this day and age.”

The wife continues, “Yeah, I’ve been with one guy.”

“Oh yeah? Who was the guy?”

“Tiger Woods.”

“Tiger Woods, the golfer?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, he’s rich, famous and handsome. I can see why you went to bed
with him.”

The husband and wife then make passionate love.

When they are done, the husband gets up and walks to the telephone.

“What are you doing?” asks the wife.

The husband says, “I’m hungry, I was going to call room service and get
something to eat.”

“Tiger wouldn’t do that.”

“Oh yeah? What would Tiger do?”

“He’d come back to bed and do it a second time.”

The husband puts down the phone and goes back to bed to make
love a second time.

When they finish, he gets up and goes over to the phone. “Now what are
you doing?” she asks.

The husband says, “I’m still hungry so I was going to get room service
to get something to eat.”

“Tiger wouldn’t do that.”

“Oh yeah? What would Tiger do?”

“He’d come back to bed and do it again.”

The guy slams down the phone, goes back to bed, and makes love one more
time.

When they finish he’s tired and beat. He drags himself over to the phone
and starts to dial.

The wife asks, “Are you calling room service?”

“No! I’m calling Tiger Woods, to find out what the par is for this damn
hole.”