Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Trouble

I usually am outta my abode at 645
Today i woke up at 630
I need an hour to get my beautiful self together in the mornings
so i left home at 730
Sent an sms to my colleague-i am running late
be there as soon as i can

Took a while getting a bus
Asswipe hiked the price
with ONLY 30 naira ooooooooooo
his reason?no fuel
i WASNT having it
others huffed and puffed
me?
had my earfones on listening to rhythm
(my fun thing to do whilst undertaking a bus ride)
E be like say dude no notice say i no open my mouth
but mennnnnnnnnnnnnnn
he wasnt getting that 30naira from me oooooooooo

EVERYONE else AFTER all their puffing conceeded the hike
me?
sitting as cool as cucumber with the unhiked fee in my hand

first station a queue-second station no queue

me?all set for TROUBLE
dude was singing praises or making noise........
i have no idea what he did all thru the journey
but i could hear him rant
i wasnt listening.....
i just know he kept asking for his money
i would give him the unhiked fee and he would reject it
i had made up my mind i was gonna get down from the bus
without paying the hiked fee

ONLY ME
i figured he could loose the 30naira from one passenger

we get to Cms
i am about to disembark.........
dude goes-give me my money,abi wetin be ur problem??
earfones still in-i calmly give him the unhiked fee
he proceeds to push me
i step back..........
I LOVE LAGOS
all the men go
leave am now
sebi na only her
collect wetin she give u

driver stretches his arm and i give him the unhiked fee
i walk away strutting
feeling pleased with meself
i got away with it again

I once got a bus ride home where i decided not to pay a hiked fee
dude ended up giving me all my money back
he hiked the fee by 50 naira
i wasnt having it
but i had no change so i gave him a 1000 naira note
pissed at myself that he would get away with his hike
well he stupidly returned five 200 naira notes to me
i didnt say a word-just pocketed my money

I am evil-i know
maybe i will try it again tonight............
bus ride home.............
not pay a hiked fee tonight(i doubt i will get away with it)
*wink*

26 comments:

SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

so na ogboju wey you dey take do dem for Lagos, eh? I don't blame you my sista. That is Lagos! The strong survive and we know what category you fall into. lol!

Nice post.


NIGERIAN CURIOSITY
IT WAS SO MUCH EASIER WHEN I ONLY HAD ONE...

In my head and around me said...

I hope they don't beat you one day. Those guys can be high on cheap drugs.

You were obviously ready for trouble. Me, I would have handed over the cash without a murmur. I like my jaw. Don't want a conductor dislocating it. LOL!

Interesting read.

ibiluv said...

LMAO.........yes.........correct ogboju for real........thanks........*blush*

ibiluv said...

@inmyheadandaroundme.......dude wasnt one of those red eyed gangster looking types.moreover with all those men in the bus,them no go gree the dude touch me....little miss butter wont melt in her mouth

ablackjamesbond said...

lol @ 'little miss butter wont melt in her mouth'
Take it easy o...some of those guys can be crazy.

fantasy queen said...

uhhhh, the day one slap from a ganja high conductor would land on ur face...lmao. Godforbid, please do your thing jo.
enjoy, after all you're little miss butter wont melt in her mouth...lol

uNWrItten* said...

lmao! sha be careful these agbero danfo boys no dey play sometimes..

Jaycee said...

Lolllllll...

Haaaaa...Shey those bus drivers and conductors don't mind beating women, abi? I'm scared of them o...

beautiful soul said...

LOL... i swear they gave you extra courage when you were created.. fear won't even let me consider it..u no de fear??? JESUS.. I shall include you in my prayers o.

Sting said...

It's either u have a lot of guts or u like trouble, which one is it?
So there is a 1000 naira note? Since when? Where have i been!

!*!*!*!*!Fresh and Fab!*!*!*!*! said...

lol, when they go catch u, beat u,u go no,lol..joke,joke

i remeber this one time, i went to do abit of shoping,bought everything,it was like £7, i gave the guy £10 note, he though i gave him £20 and gave me back £13.

i didnt say anything, as i was about to pocket the money, one stupid nono woman,standing shouting, "oh i think you gave him the wrong change". i was looking at this woman, i wante to die, i simply gave him back, acting like i didnt know.

what a day that was

Pink-satin said...

dey craeful o...one craze drunk danfo driver may not agree

ibiluv said...

@pink-satin...........me sef dey look face before i try ogboju.i dont have a death wish oooooooooooo

Afrobabe said...

Girlfriend, I love you.
You are beautiful, I think...Pls remain beautiful cos if conductor redesigns your face you are on your own oh....No Denzel lookalike is going to go for a Seal lookalike...

ibiluv said...

@ablackjamesbond.........dem dey touch breeze???

@fantasy queen.....OMIGOSH...would they dare touch me???*stunned look*

@unwritten......I say i don look motor,see how many *husbands* i get inside the motor whey no go gree make the dude touch me*wink*

@jaycee....beat me?for where?dem sef dey fear when person face strong

@beautiful soul......extra courage was needed to survive in my abode..FEAR is a word i ONLY ascribe to when it concerns THE SUPREME BEING........

@sting....guts&trouble i possess in abundance..arrogance as well.no b since 2006 we don dey spend the yeye note sef???

@fresh&fab............no mind all those yeye i too know kinda people..........msweeech(hiss soound).......


@afrobabe........i will heed ur advice...God forbid for MY OWN Denzel to not like this my Halle Berry face that i am keeping for him.*wink*

Omosewa said...

Lmao, you're so smart. Trust Nigerians to 'put mouth'...if nah oyinbo people, dem go just dey look front, shioooo.

1hr ke, you should learn to rush!!

ibiluv said...

@omosewa.........i don tell u.....ONLY for Lasgidi........me?rush my beauty regime????.....*horrifed look*

Unmodern said...

LOL ...see u profiteering form bus drivers :p

Careful sha .. u dont want some idiot messing up yoru pretty face over 30 naira

Naija Idol said...

mehnn. just thank God u've not fallen into d hands of a crazy driver. lol. nice blog.

archiwiz said...

LOL!!! I pretty much rolled around in laughter. Na you biko!

ibiluv said...

@unmodern....babe..i said i looked at face first before.....

@naija idol....i for no try am at all.........

@archiwiz.......i aim to please...

Smaragd said...

hmm... Ibiluv, u blogsteins are my friends now o, and i really am not ready to lose a friend yet plus i enjoy reading ur stuff, so in short, pls be careful u hear?just enter LAGBUS abeg!

i have pulled the stunt a coupla times in the past sha, but not anymore, the weed these danfo guys smoke these days is expired and contaminated!

fluffycutething said...

babe,

I got beaten up by an okada man for a less severe "offence" oh..

Be Kiaful....

ibiluv said...

@smaragd.......babe...i will always be here for you till Baba God calls me...i will always b carefull...luv

@fluffycutething.....why u gree the guy beat you????u for call me...i will b careful

Adekunle Shobowale said...

Girl, You're evil.

Take ie easy in Naija o. Those guys are nutters. They don't think the way normal people do.

ibiluv said...

i am evil i know....i only do that when i know i can get away with it???i won't try it with anyone after work hours....*wink